I’m not gonna lie, my expectations for Clerks 2 were about as high as a Straight Edge at an Enya concert. I mean come on, how can you take one of the greatest cult flicks of the early nineties and do a part mutha fuckin two? It was a phenomenon that the American counter-culture actually wanted to see a movie about New Jersey trash going nowhere, but who would want to see the same exact thing when it is fourteen years more pathetic?

I thought, “Has Kevin Smith ever heard the saying ‘let a dead dog lie.’” Did anyone see Basic Instinct 2?…………….. My point exactly. I mean is nothing sacred in this country anymore? What’s next, Schindler’s list 2 or Philadelphia 2? All of my fears and doubts were confirmed in the first five minutes.

Randal and Dante find themselves employed at a local burger joint after the convenience store burns to the ground. I thought, “You gotta be kidding me, I just paid to watch two dudes lack any direction in life for an hour and a half. I could hang out with my uncle for free if I wanted to see that.”

And then it happened….. I don’t quite remember what it was. Maybe it was the debate on the sexual orientation of the hobbits or maybe some bestiality reference but once the first round of laughter poured out it did not seem to stop. But it was more than a non stop laugh riot similar to Harold and Kumar. These two losers finally went through the coming-of-age experience that the first Clerks seemed to lack. I then realized that this movie did need a sequel. Randal and Dante deserved that sense of closure in their life.

There is so much pressure in this country to enter the “real world” as soon as possible. But what about for the majority of people out there who have no idea what they want in life and may never know? Clerks 2 is able to do what most comedies and sequels cannot do….make people shit there pants with laughter but also reflect on what they just saw in order to be inspired by it. I would recommend this movie to anyone who isn’t offended by the term porch monkey or scared of a little man-on-donkey action.

Rating: * * *

Top 5 other reasons to see this movie besides what is mentioned above:

1) Rosario Dawson is fine
2) Ample amounts of Buffalo Bill References
3) Rosario Dawson is smokin like a chimney
4) Cameos from the usual Kevin Smith crew (Affleck, Lee)
5) Rosario Dawson is so banging that she makes Eva Longoria look like Kathy Griffin

MaimZ